Are there benefits to engaging a life coach and how does it differ from therapy?

For a long time, Mr Alex Ng found conversations with his family upsetting, even when it was over a topic as innocuous as food.  
“When I spoke to my parents, I got frustrated, and they responded in the same way. I wanted to find a way to manage my triggers better so that our communication could be more productive,” the 44-year-old business manager said. 
Since his company offered free access to life coaching services, Mr Ng decided to give it a try.  
Having gone through therapy in 2021 to tackle a different issue, he expected a similar experience at his first life coaching session the following year. 
However, when comparing the two experiences, he found that while his therapist had helped him resolve past trauma and looked at the root of his problems, the life coach was more “future-focused”, helping him to widen his perspective on issues and work on his future goals.
He now engages his life coach once a week to work on various aspects of his life such as personal growth and work-related matters. 
Acknowledging that conversations with his family now can still be emotionally charged at times, Mr Ng said that he has seen progress and that the confrontations are less intense. 
“Of course, as I continue doing the work, new things may come up. But now, I’m more aware of my triggers … I can then influence the outcome rather than just going with the flow or reacting instinctively,” he added.  
Like Mr Ng, some people have turned to life coaching to deal with issues in their lives and although life coaching can sound similar to counselling or therapy and may have overlapping areas of focus, life coaches who spoke to CNA TODAY said that there are some clear distinctions.
Generally, psychologists address clinically diagnosed mental conditions such as depression, anxiety and post-traumatic stress disorder. 
Therapists typically work with clients on past experiences, which may hinder growth when unresolved issues resurface.
Life coaches focus more on helping clients move forward and achieve their goals. 
Using an analogy, life coach Joel Tan explained that it is similar to seeing a doctor, a fitness instructor or a physiotherapist. These experts understand the human anatomy, but they apply it in different ways and work with different groups.
Mr Tan, who is also the founder of coaching firm Upraise, said: “For example, if you go to a doctor, they attend to the sick, not the healthy. The same goes for a physiotherapist – they work with the injured.
“But if you go to a personal trainer, they focus on the healthy person who wants to get stronger or reach the next level.
“In parallel, psychologists and therapists work with those who are more ‘wounded’, while life coaches tend to focus on ‘healthier’, higher-performing individuals, helping them reach the next level.”
However, the coaches acknowledged that there may be overlaps as some of them may encounter clients with past trauma or emotional baggage, or those who express dark thoughts such as suicidal ideation. 
Dr Jade Kua, a life and health coach, said that in such a situation, it is the coaches’ ethical duty to refer them to a psychiatrist for more specialised help.
Mr Raymond Lim, founder of life coaching company RL Consultancy, said that people usually seek life coaching when they are stuck at a certain point in their lives and unable to move to the next stage of growth.
Some common challenges include the struggle to balance work, family and personal time; work or career burnout; and navigating certain life or work changes such as a new baby, adjustments at work or home, or a career promotion. 
Depending on the coaches’ expertise, clients may also seek executive or leadership coaching. These goals often include building a positive self-image, developing self-discipline and control, and working towards happiness or success.
The life coaching industry has had its fair share of critics and sceptics, with the main concern that clients are strung along and encouraged to continue sessions for as long as possible with no definitive end or outcome. 
Neurodiversity and leadership coach Mavis McAllister, who works at Promises Healthcare clinic, said that clients may easily become dependent on their coach just because they enjoy having “a nice conversation”. 
This should not be the case, she added.
She advised clients to proactively ask their coaches how long it will take to achieve their goals and continually check in with them on that timeline. 
“It’s a partnership. The problem is, if you’re working with an unethical therapist or coach and … you’re depressed or struggling with something, you might not be thinking about these things, and you might not ask the right questions,” she said. 
“But you have to. And if your coach doesn’t want you to ask questions, that’s a red flag. Find someone else.” 
Life coaches told CNA TODAY that professional life coaches should be devising plans with various goals and milestones for their clients after assessing a person’s suitability for coaching. 
These timelines may differ for individuals, Mr Lim from RL Consultancy said.
Generally, though, clients may see a significant shift in their thoughts, perspectives and mindsets within six to 12 months.
“Some goals, depending on their complexity, may take two to three years to achieve fully, and I set timelines that reflect each individual’s unique aspirations and challenges,” he said. 
Ms McAllister said that clients should also be aware of what they are paying for and recognise that coaching is not just about “talking things through”.
“You need to ask yourself: Am I making progress? Am I moving forward? Or am I just having a nice chat? Could I get the same benefit from talking to a friend?” she added.  
“Coaching isn’t about going in circles or staying stuck in the same place. It’s about progress.
“It’s tempting for some clients to think, ‘I like this person. They’re listening to me’, but listening alone isn’t coaching. It’s just a conversation.” 
As harsh as it may sound, she explained that she sometimes has to tell clients who “just like talking things through” that this is not the purpose of their sessions.
Proper coaching requires them to leave with an “actionable takeaway” to work on, she said.
When it comes to choosing a suitable life coach, Mr Tan of Upraise said that a word-of-mouth recommendation is a good start, especially from someone who has experienced first-hand what it is like to work with a specific life coach. 
He added that years of practice and accreditation are also good indicators, since a life coach must clock the hours to improve their expertise.
“If 100 life coaches all take the same course, what differentiates them is the practice and the number of hours they’ve spent coaching. This experience sets apart a good life coach from a mediocre one,” he added.  
Dr Kua, who runs her coaching academy Jade Life & Wellness, said that she would only consider a life coach who has their own coach.
“Your coach has to walk the talk.”  
Other areas to consider are similar values and life experiences.
“Choose a coach you feel comfortable with and whose values align with yours. Finding a coach with similar life experiences or milestones can also create a stronger connection and trust, making it easier to open up and share your journey,” Mr Lim of RL Consultancy said. 
Mr Tan said, however, that if a person desperately needs to reach out to a professional but has no idea which path to take, the best course of action is to just reach out to any professional first. 
“Be less concerned about whether it’s a life coach, therapist or counsellor. The most important thing is to speak to someone. A responsible and professional practitioner should be able to assess whether they can help you or if they need to refer you to another specialist,” he added.